If Only I Could Tell You

by Hannah Beckerman

A TWIST THAT WILL BREAK YOUR HEART . . . AN ENDING THAT WILL PUT IT BACK TOGETHER AGAIN.

'I loved it' Jojo Moyes

'Compelling and moving . . . it made me cry' Marian Keyes

*****

Audrey's family has fallen apart. Her two grown-up daughters, Jess and Lily, are estranged, and her two teenage granddaughters have never been allowed to meet. A secret that echoes back thirty years has splintered the family in two, but is also the one thing keeping them connected.

As tensions reach breaking point, the irrevocable choice that one of them made all those years ago is about to surface. After years of secrets and silence, how can one broken family find their way back to each other?

*****

Praise for If Only I Could Tell You:

'A must-read. An absorbing tale of long-buried family secrets, grief and guilt with a midpoint twist that changes everything' - SUNDAY EXPRESS MAGAZINE

'Resolutely heartbreaking...in a plot galvanised by guilt...quieter observations become just as unravelling' - GUARDIAN

'A tender portrait of family lives, losses and secrets' Clare Mackintosh, author of I Let You Go
'Tense, moving and tender' - SUN ON SUNDAY

'Tender, heartbreaking and utterly beautiful' - PSYCHOLOGIES

'Utterly compelling and completely heart-breaking. I couldn't put it down' Ruth Hogan, author of The Keeper of Lost Things

'A powerful novel about grief, guilt and...secrets' - SUNDAY EXPRESS

'Emotionally engaging, clever & wonderfully satisfying' Kate Mosse, author of The Burning Chambers

'A tender and heartbreaking second novel' - DAILY MAIL

'If Only I Could Tell You breaks your heart, but with an incredible skill and elegance... I loved it to bits' Joanna Cannon, author of The Trouble With Goats and Sheep

'Life-affirming' - RED

• ISBN10: 0062890549
• ISBN13: 9780062890542
• Publish Date: 27 June 2023 (first published 21 February 2019)
• Publish Status: Active
• Publish Country: US
• Publisher: HarperCollins Publishers
• Imprint: Collins
• Format: Paperback (US Trade)
• Pages: 368
• Language: English

Reviews

[zooloo1983]

What can I say that has not already been said? Get the blinking tissues ready for this one, I mean this book should come with that warning!! We are not talking about the small leaky problem, we are talking huge tears, which could eventually turn into sobs, especially if you are feeling emotional already! Jeez!

The three women, Audrey, the mother and her two children, Lily and Jess ripped apart by a terrible secret. It did keep me guessing what the secret was and I thought I had got it a few times but changed my mind. Still when you get there, if you are not already emotional by then you will be. Slowly as the story unfurls heartbreak features heavily in their lives. I want to reach in and just give them all a hug.

So much is happening in this book, it deals with so many different topics, and the way that If Only I Could Tell You is written leaves you flicking the pages over so quickly as you are engulfed in all the emotions of each character. With the writing so exquisite you will not want to be putting this book down, because if you are like me you will get sucked into their world, living their lives with a need to know what has destroyed this family.

With flashbacks to the past adding an extra depth to the story, one of the flashbacks that got me the most was Phoebe (Lily’s daughter) and Mia (Jess’ daughter) meeting and playing in Audrey’s garden. When Audrey’s daughters turn up and see them play and the sisters, in turn, argue just showed how far apart they have come but what for! Aaargh!! In fact, all the flashbacks got me!

There are no words I can use to give this book any sense of justice it deserves. You need to read it for yourself and become as captivated as I have with this family. It is beautiful, brutal and will leave you feeling so raw and quite frankly a blubbering wreck. That is all I can say.