If He Had Been with Me

by Laura Nowlin

A New York Times Bestseller
An achingly authentic and raw portrait of love, regret, and the life-altering impact of the relationships we hold closest to us, this YA bestseller is perfect for fans of Kasie West, All the Bright Places, and Dear Evan Hansen
If he had been with me, everything would have been different…
Autumn and Finn used to be inseparable. But then something changed. Or they changed. Now, they do their best to ignore each other.
Autumn has her boyfriend Jamie, and her close-knit group of friends. And Finn has become that boy at school, the one everyone wants to be around.
That still doesn't stop the way Autumn feels every time she and Finn cross paths, and the growing, nagging thought that maybe things could have been different. Maybe they should be together.
But come August, things will change forever. And as time passes, Autumn will be forced to confront how else life might have been different if they had never parted ways…
Captivating and heartbreaking, If He Had Been with Me is perfect for readers looking for:
Contemporary teen romance books unputdownable novels complex emotional YA stories Jenny Han meets Dear Evan Hansen

• ISBN10: 1402277822
• ISBN13: 9781402277825
• Publish Date: 2 May 2013 (first published 1 January 2013)
• Publish Status: Active
• Publish Country: US
• Imprint: Sourcebooks Fire
• Format: Paperback (US Trade)
• Pages: 336
• Language: English

Reviews

[Bianca]

And I love him. For all of my memory, I have loved him; I do not even notice it anymore. I feel what I have always felt when I look at him, and I have never before asked myself what it is exactly. I love him in a way I cannot define, as if my love were an organ within my body that I could not live without yet could not pick out of an anatomy book.

[Sam@WLABB]

I don't know if I can truly embrace the ending, but I was obsessed with reading this book. Started it this morning and could not wait to finish it. Even though I knew how the story was going to end from the beginning of the book, I was left sobbing and heartbroken. For real, after I finished reading this book, it haunted me as I tried to sleep. When something evokes that much emotion from me, it is a job well done.

[Kelly]

After finishing If He Had Been With Me, I kept thinking what the moral of the novel was, as it starts with the tragedy and the rest of the novel is made up of reflections. Is it that life is short? I just didn't find the deeper meaning.

I was slightly disturbed that a group of non conforming teens never swore. It tries to squeeze too many social issues in. It just wasn't my cup of tea, but if I do ever have a non conforming, reclusive, mildly gothic child someday, this guidebook may come in handy. It's such a shame, I love that cover!

[Cocktails and Books]

I couldn't resist this book. I am a sucker for a best friends coming of age story and this one sounded like a heartrending, tearjerker...and it was that and more. I absolutely loved Autumn and Phineas. The book had such a rich mix of relationship dynamics from sisterhood to parent/child to male/female relationships. I think every single bond was explored in this book in a very relatable way with excellent writing by the author.

The author achieved quite a feat because you knew something tragic was going to happen, but you couldn't help but keep reading anyway. Most of the time if you know how a book ends there is no point in reading it, but this book had so much in the lines of the text and meaning between the lines that it almost seemed like I could focus more on the story at the time rather than how it ended.

I laughed at the quirks of childhood and adolescence. I cried at the growing pains that Phineas and Autumn had. My heart broke when Autumn described what it was like to live with someone with mental illness and experienced her own bout with it. I smiled when I read about the strong bond between the mothers of Phineas and Autumn. There's something about knowing your bestie (who happens to also be your next door neighbor) is right there with you through the thick and thin.

This book sucked me in and wouldn't let me go. I became far more invested in the storyline and these characters than I ever intended. I was doing the silent scream for Phineas not to leave...as if I could keep him from going. I actually found myself putting my hand over my ipad and saying no Phineas please change your mind, but he left and I cried right along with the characters. I'm not sure if I like the way the author left the story sort of hanging at the end. I would love to know the results of the test but then again could I stand it if it wasn't what I wanted it to be? So read the book and judge for yourself. It wasn't a fast paced read but you will enjoy the journey. This goes to the top of my MUST READ list.

Reviewed by Michelle for Cocktails and Books