As I Descended

by Robin Talley

From the acclaimed author of Lies We Tell Ourselves, Robin Talley, comes a Shakespeare-inspired story of revenge and redemption, where fair is foul, and foul is fair. Maria Lyon and Lily Boiten are their school's ultimate power couple-but one thing stands between them and their perfect future: campus superstar Delilah Dufrey. Golden child Delilah is a legend at exclusive Acheron Academy, and the presumptive winner of the distinguished Cawdor Kingsley Prize. But Delilah doesn't know that Lily and Maria are willing to do anything-absolutely anything-to unseat Delilah for the scholarship. After all, it would lock in Maria's attendance at Stanford-and assure her and Lily four more years in a shared dorm room. Together, Maria and Lily harness the dark power long rumored to be present on the former plantation that houses their school. But when feuds turn to fatalities, and madness begins to blur the distinction between what's real and what's imagined, the girls must attempt to put a stop to the chilling series of events they've accidentally set in motion.

• ISBN10: 0062409239
• ISBN13: 9780062409232
• Publish Date: 6 September 2016
• Publish Status: Active
• Out of Print: 10 April 2021
• Publish Country: US
• Publisher: HarperCollins Publishers Inc
• Imprint: HarperTeen
• Format: Hardcover
• Pages: 384
• Language: English

Reviews

[nannah]

DNF @ 20%

I was already hanging on by a thread, but when the main characters planned on drugging their classmate so she would fail a drug test and be out of the way to win the scholarship prize Maria coveted, I was out. Maria only wanted this prize to stay with her girlfriend and so she could look good for her mother, who's in politics.

And okay, so I admit I've long forgotten the details of MacBeth, but none of the characters are likable or relatable. They're all rich and cruel to each other, with the protagonist saying, a certain character was the only one who mattered or was worth her time, despite having a best friend. The protagonist's girlfriend makes fun of her old roommate having nightmares because she was never bothered by them.

The author seems very disconnected from reality. Lily, the disabled character, is practically waited on hand and foot by the staff of her high school. This Does Not Happen in any reality I've lived in. Maybe it's different now, but I've personally only faced obstacles, not privileges, unless it's people trying to help open doors or hold things for me. At least the character doesn't like all the babying. But she also receives a controlled medication for her pain, which she gives away. This is baffling. Do you know how much I'm interrogated every doctor's appointment on the use of my medication, which isn't even a TRUE controlled substance? If Lily is in enough pain to need a controlled substance, she wouldn't be "well enough" to go without it, to hand it off to someone else. Sure, this probably happens to someone in real life. But they must be a pretty darn good actor, and have to be going into their appointments with the intention to scam medication out of their doctor. It is incredibly difficult to get strong pain medication, even when you're in incredibly strong pain. Without my pain meds, I'm basically just lying on the floor in too much pain to get up. I just can't get over the fact that some of the major plot points happen because Lily is just able to go without her oxycontin.

The author is also white, and she adds these lines about slavery that just make me grit my teeth; for example, "Meanwhile, Maria and Mateo both had the Spanish names, dark eyes, and brown skin that would've kept them off those Old South plantations--unless they'd come with a price tag." Sure, that could've been just the PoV of the white character, but I'm not reading an entire novel of this.

And THEN there's the whole plot line where one of the people in a same-sex relationship wants to keep their relationship a secret and the other doesn't - and it's a big source of tension between them. It's been over done, and it's not a great trope in general.

When all these factors add up, it's just not a novel I want to continue reading.

[ccbookwitch]

To start out this review, I'm going to give you a run down of all the types of lesbians you will find in this book:

closeted lesbians
creeped out but skeptical lesbians
lesbians who can talk to spirits
diabolical lesbians
regretful lesbians
highly concerned lesbians
super terrified lesbians
pretty darn crazy lesbians
To be fair, these lesbians are all the same two lesbians, namely Maria and Lily. This book is obviously super intense, and goes all over the place in the drama department. It's a Macbeth retelling, too, so it's super dark and creepy as well. It's atmospheric and you can feel the fog of bad things coming on every page.

The setting is perfect for the story. First of all, I'm a total sucker for boarding school stories. and a haunted boarding school? Don't even get me started. I loved getting to know the dark history behind the school and thought it was woven into the story very well. Acheron wasn't just there for the sake of making the story more appealing, it was really it's own character.

Though I loved the setting, the retelling aspect, the diversity (including disability rep!), and the strong writing, I did find myself wanting a little more in terms of character goals and the relationship between Lily and Maria. It seemed like they lost sight of their goals pretty quickly after the first bad thing that happens (trying not to spoil so I'm being vague), and then we don't get to see much of their relationship either. Maybe the way it was played out was realistic, but I wanted them to be even more diabolical and focused on their goals.

Despite those little quibbles, I still loved this book and highly, highly recommend it. I can't believe I've waited this long to read something by Robin Talley, and I don't anticipate this being the last book I read by her. If you're looking for something with a lot of diversity with a heavy dose of creepiness and have a love of Macbeth, definitely check this one out.

[Angie]

I knew I shouldn't have read As I Descended, but I couldn't resist. I don't like ghost stories, but I've been devouring all the LGBTQ+ YA that I can get my hands on. Sadly, even awesome diversity can't make me interested in murderous ghosts. When it opens, Maria, Lily, and Brandon are attempting to communicate with the spirits using a Ouija board. It gets cold, the candles flicker, the panchette spells out ominous messages in Spanish, then the chandelier falls before the girls can say goodbye. Cue the not-so-creepy creepy happenings.

As I Descended was just not creepy or suspenseful at all. Which is saying a lot, since I am a huge baby. The Ouija board opening scene was cliche and dull which did not bode well for the rest of the book. Maria knows all about spirits and believes the one that visited is her dead grandmother. Then weird things start happening and Maria gets caught up in the power of having ghosts behind her to get what she wants. That's really it. Nothing jumpy. Nothing that kept me at the edge of my seat. Just ghosts doing stuff and Maria freaking out about it.

I also never believed Maria's motivation in doing anything that she did. Her girlfriend Lily convinced her to give another girl drugs so that she'd fail her drug test and get suspended or whatever. Then that would put Maria in first place for this scholarship. Well...okay, but that isn't the only scholarship in existence right? I mean, Maria is #2 in their class. That's nothing to scoff at. She has great grades, is on the soccer team, and her mom is a senator. She can definitely get another scholarship, so why result to drugging other students and then asking ghosts to harm others? It made no sense.

As I Descended just disappointed me, but I suppose a lot of that was my fault. I knew going into it that I didn't like ghosts, and I'm not familiar with Macbeth so I couldn't comment on how it does as a retelling. Really the only thing that it had going for it to me was the diversity. All of the main characters are queer, two are Hispanic, and one is disabled.

Read more of my reviews at Pinkindle Reads & Reviews.

[Jo]

3.5 Stars.

Originally posted on Once Upon a Bookcase.

I have been so excited to read As I Descended by Robin Talley ever since Talley first announced she was writing a contemporary lesbian retelling of Macbeth - I was completely sold on the idea! It was seriously gripping, but I did feel a little disappointed.

I completely loved the idea of a contemporary retelling of Macbeth, a gender-bent one at that where Macbeth was a girl - Maria - and making Macbeth and Lady Macbeth a same sex couple. It such a really cool idea! Especially with setting it at a high school where popularity can mean everything, and I could totally see how ambitious Maria and her girlfriend Lily could be.

As I Descended is narrated by five characters; Maria, Lily, Brandon - Maria's best friend, Mateo - Brandon's boyfriend, and Delilah herself, though she only narrates for a short while. It's been well over ten years since I studied Macbeth at school, so while I remembered the major parts of the story, there were a number of things I had forgotten. So I couldn't place the characters in the original play that were represented by Brandon and Mateo, and I think that worked in my favour, as it meant there were a number of surprises coming my way. In case any readers don't know who they would represent, I won't mention it here, but those who the play well may be able to guess.

I was completely sucked into this story, wondering how the major parts of the play that I remembered would play out in this novel. There are no witches in this retelling, but spirits. Acheron Academy was once a plantation where tragedy struck, and spirits now haunt the place. Maria has always been able to see ghosts and spirits, and when Lily suggests a seance one night, she is really doesn't want to, but Lily is persuasive. That seance? It changes everything. A connection has been made that isn't broken. The spirits tell Maria of her future - "That which is second will be first." Maria is now almost constantly aware of the spirits' presence, and their malevolence.

I was surprised at just how scared, doubtful and unsure Maria was at the beginning. I remembered that Lady Macbeth had to persuade Macbeth to take the path he does, but Maria didn't want to take the path she does at all. Lily exerts so much control over Maria, using emotional blackmail to get her to do what she wants - using the "if you love me, you would" - and she is so cold and heartless. Such a wonderful Lady Macbeth, but pretty frightening, the lengths she is willing to go to to get what she wants: four more years with Maria at Stanford university, which will only happen if Maria wins the Cawford Kingsley Prize. That was something I didn't quite get, to be honest. Acheron Academy is a really expensive private school; you can only go there if you have very rich parents or have a scholarship. Maria's parents pay for her attendance, and from everything we learn about them, I'm pretty sure they could pay for Maria to go to Stanford, so I don't see why she needed the Prize so badly. This is one of a few things that didn't make much sense to me.

Once Delilah is out of the picture, things start to go downhill pretty fast. Maria doesn't cope well at first with what's happened to Delilah, but soon she realises it's for the best, for her and Lily, and she becomes quite savagely determined and someone quite cold and sinister. All the terrible things that continue to happen, even the things that shake her, she is able to justify away. This is the way it's supposed to be, this is what needs to happen. Lily's change, though, was even more dramatic. She's scared underneath it all; scared of anyone finding out she is a lesbian and is with Maria. She's worried what people will think of her - despite no-one having an issue with Brandon and Mateo - and of what her parents will say. She feels like there will be more freedom for her and Maria at Stanford, which is why she so desperately wants Maria to come with her. But a little while after things start happening, we start to see the "madness" of Lady Macbeth creep in. This is so wonderfully done, because with the spirits, you're never sure what is actually happening, and what Lily is imagining. As I Descended does have a creepy atmosphere to it, but it's not so much the spirits that I found disturbing, but how the events affect the two girls, especially Lily. The things she sees, how the spirits haunt her - if they actually are - it's enough to cause anyone a nervous breakdown. Seeing the stress and the fear create that decline in her, and eventually break her, was really quite frightening, because it's the part of the story that could actually happening; a mentally ill person could experience such terrifying hallucinations and end up not realising what's real and what's not. And without help, what then? It was really upsetting to read.

My main problem with the story were the spirits themselves, and the belief that Maria puts in them. Although it's explained why Acheron Academy is full of spirits, there were elements that seemed really far-fetched and unbelievable. I know fantastical elements of stories require a suspension of disbelief, but the story is also supposed to make those elements believable. I had too many questions. Why would the spirits know the future? Why was there a pattern, a history to some events? What is it the spirits wanted? Why would Maria just go ahead and do what spirits told her - even if she did believe her former nanny was one of them? I found this whole side of the story to be kind of weak. There just wasn't enough behind it, like with the rest of the story. Which is so strange, because the spirits play a huge part of the book. But it's not enough for me to say, "the spirits are here, and they're doing these things." I want to know why. This is a story, it's not real, this could be explained.

As I Descended is a hugely diverse novel, though. Lily is a lesbian (as is Talley, making this an #OwnVoices novel), and because of a car accident when she was younger, she's disabled; she suffers from a lot of pain in her legs and requires the use of crutches to get around. Maria is bisexual and latina, Brandon is gay, and Mateo is gay and latino. What was great about the diversity of the book is that the various identities are almost incidental to the story, and yet inform the individual characters beliefs or choices. As previously mentioned, Lily is terrified what people will think if they know she and Maria are together, which is why she wants Maria to win the Cawdor Kingsley Prize so much. Her disability means she has to take pain medication, something that becomes pretty important we discover a short way into the story. The spirits communicate to Maria in Spanish, which leads Maria to believe certain things about them. Mateo knows the story of the ghost La Llorona from Mexican folklore, and that plays into how he sees and thinks about things that happen, and also his relationship with Brandon is the reason he becomes more involved as events transpire; at first the two are only together because they are the only two gay people at the school, but their relationship develops. These characters identities make a difference to who they are as people, which affects the story as a whole - they seem incidental, but they make a big difference.

As I Descended was a really interesting and gripping story, and a great retelling of the Macbeth play. I loved seeing how the story translated to a contemporary setting, I just wish there were more answers regarding the spirits. But still, well worth a read, as it was really enjoyable!

Thank you to Young Adult HQ for the review copy.