Before I Go

by Colleen Oakley

[Leah]

Before I Go was probably the first 2015 read I received to review from Netgalley. It's been sitting on my Kindle since late summer, I think, but because I don't read on a first come/first served basis, I read by month - so I'm writing this review in December, and I'm currently plowing through my January releases. I feel like I've already read 50 (more like 15) but I've still got over 20 to go and it's already the middle of December. I dunno what to tell you, clearly publishers are making up for the lack of December releases with an absolute shed-load in January. I knew I had to be in the right emotional mind for Before I Go, because the title tells you all you need to know about the book, am I right?

There's lots of books about dying. It's a rather sombre choice to write about, but it can be done very well - The Last Days of Rabbit Hayes and The Dead Wife's Handbook spring to mind of two recent reads. It can also be amusing in the case of Cally Taylor's Heaven Can Wait. Before I Go definitely errs on the side of emotional, and it always feels so sad to me to know that I'm reading a book about a character who I will literally have to say goodbye to. There would be no happy ever after for Daisy and Jack, because Daisy is dying. I couldn't see them spending their days in Florida, sitting on a balcony, watching the sea, and so it meant I went in to the book already feeling quite sad and emotional.

But despite its emotion, and despite knowing Daisy is going to die, it's still a very beautiful book. It was beautiful and heartbreaking all at the same time as we see Daisy and Jack some to terms with Daisy's illness. It was especially heartbreaking to see them fracture. When you meet a couple who just seem so in sync as Daisy and Jack do, it's hard to watch an illness like cancer tear them apart and it very much broke my heart to see Daisy pushing Jack away, and Daisy going on her crazy mission to find Jack a new wife before she passed. It's nice, in a way, but also heartbreaking. Especially because it's unimaginable - how could Jack fall in love again so soon after losing his wife? That's the bit Daisy never thought of; it wasn't a simple case of losing a pet, and then perhaps getting another pet. (Not to cheapen the loss of a pet - we lost our dog Scruffy in 2013, and we got Duna a month or so later, and it was bloody hard at first, to get used to Scruffy not being there, and Duna suddenly being there.)

Before I Go was a wonderful read. I really enjoyed getting to know Daisy, Jack and Kayleigh, Daisy's best friend. There was an absolute tinge of sadness to every page I read, but I loved it anyway and I raced through the novel in a little over three hours. I really enjoyed the novel, right up until the end. It's been a while since I've been so fully immersed in a novel, that I've loved each and every page, and also wished for an entirely different, magical, miraculous ending. It's a beautiful debut novel, one I'm glad I (eventually) got around to reading. I can't wait to read more from Colleen Oakley, she is a fantastic storyteller - although, could we have something a teensy bit happier next time, please, Colleen? :){Leah Loves} http://leah-loves.com http://leah-loves.com/books-go-colleen-oakley/