Pretend You Love Me

by Julie Anne Peters

[Angie]

Pretend You Love Me touches on a lot of interesting and important topics, but I never connected with Mike at all, which is a huge problem for a character driven novel. Mike is just going about her life: work, school, trying not to think about her father's suicide. Then Xanadu transfers to her school, and Mike cannot keep her eyes or thoughts off of her. After a bit of an awkward first meeting (Xana thinks Mike is a guy), the two become fast friends, although Mike wants more and thinks Xana might too. Is that just wishful thinking or is something really between them?

I'll start with why I didn't like Mike. She puts her pride before anything else. I have said this many times before, but I'll say it again: I do not like characters who refuse help when they need it! Mike doesn't want to be a charity case, and that's perfectly understandable. But people genuinely want to help her go to softball camp. She lives in a small town where everybody knows everybody. These people have watched her grow up, have seen her play, and want to see her go on to do great things. Her reaction to the "can-paign" came across as very ungrateful to me. It's not like she asked or begged anyone to pay her way. Someone just thought she deserves it and set this all up, after Mike flat out refused to apply for financial aid (again because of "charity"). It's just very frustrating to me, especially because Mike doesn't always charge for her repair services, or accepts payments that are way under what she should be paid. Why is she allowed to act charitably toward her townspeople, but no one is allowed to do the same for her?

Aside from Mike's dream of playing professional softball, Pretend You Love Me mainly focuses on her feelings toward Xanadu. Xana is straight, and she's never given any impression that she was otherwise. Mike is just so infatuated with her that she's seeing something that's not there, and not seeing what everyone else can see. Even her best friend, Jamie, points out that Xana is never going to love her like that. Xana is quite insensitive to Mike's feelings, too. She goes on and on about her boyfriend even though she knows how Mike feels. She's also a manicpixiedreamgirl if there ever was one. Mike hides things about herself, does thing out of character, all to impress the goddess that is Xana. I'm sure we've all been there at some point.

There's also a lot of talk of grief, depression, and addiction in Pretend You Love Me. Mike's father committed suicide two years ago. He was also an alcoholic. Mike's family has never been the same since he died. Her mother became morbidly obese, stopped talking to Mike at all, and just sits in her room eating day in and day out. Mike is just sooo angry at her mother's behavior, but it isn't until a confrontation later in the book that she comes to understand why her mother is this way. Her brother, who comes across as a total prick at first, actually becomes a great voice of reason and a support to Mike once she lets him.

Pretend You Love Me does have a lot of good qualities and messages in it. For me though, I just could not get passed how Mike reacts to people wanting to help her. It's okay to be independent, but she's all about her. She doesn't look at how it makes others feel good to do something good for one of their own. I also didn't like how she talked bad about Jamie for being on the more flamboyant side. They're the only (out) gay people in their town, but she doesn't like having the same label as him, because of how it acts. I totally get that she's not at the same level of comfort with her sexuality as he is, but she really shouldn't shame him for being himself just because she's not being herself.

Read more of my reviews at Pinkindle Reads & Reviews.