Contains Spoilers: For those who love the insightful writing styles of Sophie Kinsella, Beth O’Leary, or Casey McQuiston, Amy Spalding writes a romantic, yet cautionary tale of just how impacting the affects of a toxic relationship can truly be. This slower paced queer romance was made for anyone who has suffered a life altering break up and may have not made it to the other side, or worst yet - for those close to someone who has yet to realize their friend/sibling/parent may be slowly losing themselves in a toxic relationship. Amy reminds the reader that it is ok if you are not right for someone as that someone may be completely wrong for you. Don’t lose who you are to keep someone who may not deserve you.
What I liked about this book: Initially reading this book, truth be told, I was bored - not because it wasn’t able to capture my attention; but because, like Nina - I couldn’t see the forest for the trees. I was introduced to Nina running late to meet her girlfriend Taylor, causing her to hit a pedestrian, so the words Taylor subsequently uttered were valid and the break up was justified. Joining Nina three years later, I too believed what she was doing was for the best if she was truly that much of a burden - until I was allowed to see who Nina was through the eyes of those around her. Being privy to the world she shut out, suddenly my curiosity got the best of me, pulling me into the story and stirring a strong sense of suspicion that Taylor may have been more toxic than perspective. What broke my heart and made me want to hold on to Nina was constantly watching Taylor’s words poison everything good in her life. Amy did an amazing job of slowly burrowing into my heart; hoping, wishing, praying that Nina would finally realize Taylor for who/what she was and stop standing in the way of her own happiness.
What I didn’t like about the book: Nothing, I love everything about this book. I loved how much Nina evolved and the ying/yang of her and Ari. I loved how much friendship played a role in Nina’s growth and support as well as a reminder that a therapist is the most important ingredient when attempting to heal. Most of all I loved when we went full circle and Nina crossed paths with Taylor again, she had no idea how her night was going to end but she finally got the closure her heart needed to open for Ari. She became who she was meant to be, in her own time, letting go of a sense of foreboding that was suffocating herself.
Words cannot begin to describe the impact this book will have. The first thing I wanted to do when I finished was recommend it to a good friend who I swear could have been Nina, with the same list of faults given to her by her former girlfriend, making parts of this story more real than fiction for me. Amy’s message of love, forgiveness, redemption, mental health, and acceptance is the golden combination of what makes a good book a lasting memory.