Reviewed by Sam@WLABB on
Look, this book is about a young woman, who chose death over continuing to live in an abusive and oppressive home. Yes, it's devastating at times, but it's also absolutely beautiful.
The story begins after Ellie's death, and as she watches others grieve for her, she starts to remember her past and the events leading up to her suicide. Ellie's life was full of painful moments courtesy of her abusive and controlling father. However, there were also these intermittent periods of joy, which she was unable to see, when she was alive.
Those memories were utterly beautiful, and I was grateful I got to see them, but seeing them made me grieve even more for Ellie. I knew she felt trapped in her life, and she had lost so much. Her father had stolen so much from her. He robbed her of her hardworking, stable, fun, and reliable mom. He took her best friend from her, and isolated her. And, when he stripped her of all hope, she found herself pulled into an inescapable blackhole of depression.
And, I cried. I cried for the future Ellie would never have, for the things she would never experience, and the freedom she would never enjoy. I cried for her mother, who didn't actually give up. I cried for August, who never stopped caring for her. Seeing how much these two loved Ellie made me hope she really wasn't gone, but she was.
Still, I am thankful for this beautiful book. It is not a romanticized story of suicide by any means. It's about someone's regret in not being able to see the good things hidden among the bad. This book is an important reminder to someone like me, who lives with depression, to seek those points of light in my life. To look for those pockets of hope, when I am feeling hopeless. I think it can be a good message for many people.
*ARC provided in exchange for an honest review.
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Reading updates
- Started reading
- 13 March, 2020: Finished reading
- 13 March, 2020: Reviewed