Even If I Fall by Abigail Johnson

Even If I Fall

by Abigail Johnson

Don’t miss this deeply emotional, romantic and layered novel from Abigail Johnson, whose stories have been described as “smart,” “heartfelt,” “genuine” and “complex,” featuring a boy and girl who should never have become friends, let alone fallen in love. Perfect for fans of Kasie West, Morgan Matson, and Sarah Dessen.

A year ago, Brooke Covington lost everything when her beloved older brother, Jason, confessed to the murder of his best friend, Calvin. Brooke and her family became social pariahs, broken and unable to console one another. Brooke’s only solace remains the ice-skating rink, where she works but no longer lets herself dream about a future skating professionally.

When Brooke encounters Calvin’s younger brother, Heath, on the side of the road and offers him a ride, everything changes. She needs someone to talk to…and so does Heath. No one else understands what it’s like. Her brother, alive but gone; his brother, dead but everywhere. Soon, they’re meeting in secret, despite knowing that both families would be horrified if they found out. In the place of his anger and her guilt, something frighteningly tender begins to develop, drawing them ever closer together.

But when a new secret comes out about the murder, Brooke has to choose whose pain she’s willing to live with—her family’s or Heath’s. Because she can’t heal one without hurting the other.

Reviewed by Sam@WLABB on

5 of 5 stars

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Rating: 4.5 Stars

Brooke's brother may have been the one, who committed the crime, but her whole family became prisoners. They were shunned by their neighbors and friends, and forced to give up their jobs and their dreams, but the worst part was that they abandoned each other. Then Brooke found comfort in an unlikely source, but nurturing this forbidden friendship could shatter her already fragile family.

• Pro: Abigail Johnson is so good at taking me on an emotional roller coaster! I swear I experienced every single emotion known while reading this book.

• Pro: This family was so broken, and their pain emanated from the page. There was a good deal of focus on the family's struggle with reconciling the son and brother they loved with this cold-blooded killer he became. I shed tears for this family, because I can only imagine how difficult their situation was, and my heart broke for them.

• Pro: I loved Brooke. She made some mistakes in this book by isolating herself and pushing people away, but she never gave up on her family.

• Pro: The relationship between Brooke and Heath was so complicated and messy and wonderful. They could understand each other in a way other people couldn't. It was really beautiful seeing those two working through some of the fallout together, and I was shipping them the whole time.

• Pro: Brooke was an ice skater, and I really enjoyed all parts featuring the sport, but more than that, it was what made her feel alive, and I loved the whole idea of this, and how she slowly allowed herself to have that again.

• Pro: This book was equal parts family drama, friendship saga, mystery, and romance. Johnson combined all the elements brilliantly, and I found myself fully engrossed in this story.

Overall: A beautiful story of broken people trying to pick up the pieces and begin living again, which warmed my heart and left me hopeful.

*ARC provided in exchange for an honest review.

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Reading updates

  • Started reading
  • 10 December, 2018: Finished reading
  • 10 December, 2018: Reviewed