Vile Village (Series of Unfortunate Events, #7)

by Lemony Snicket

The seventh book, The Vile Village, sees the Baudelaire's back in Mr Poe's office waiting to find out what latest terrible living circumstance he's managed to find. Unfortunately, even distant relatives want nothing to do with them and Mr Poe is reduced to a new government program based on the idea 'it takes a village to raise a child'. The children at least have a choice of village - but with Paltryville (the location of the Lucky Smells Lumbermill, book 4), Tedia (near where Uncle Monty lives, book 2), Ophelia (Mr Poe vetoes this because of a rival bank - Ophelia Bank - yes good you have the children's welfare in mind) and V.F.D. - the final choice seems an obvious one. I mean, they still have no idea what V.F.D. stands for but being in a place that has the same initials can only lead them to the answers they seek.

Or not.

V.F.D. stands for the Village of Fowl Devotees and is home to a murder of crows. Although the whole village is supposed to be looking after them, they are placed in the care of Hector - the handyman - and are expected to confirm to the 19,000+ rules the town has and to do all the chores. Because what else would you do with three orphans.

Hector is an alright guardian by the standards of the Baudelaire's previous guardians - which means he believes them, he feeds them and he cares for them - but like all the rest is unwilling or unable to actually stand up to the town and defend them or help them when needed. On the other hand he's willing to let them live with forever and is even willing to home the Quagmire triplets if they ever find them. So still not the worst guardian they've had.

And then they're told that Count Olaf has been captured. If they could just find the Quagmire's then all would be well, but alas it's not to be. Count Olaf is really Jacques Snicket and before he gets a chance to explain why he has a matching eye tattoo on his ankle (apparently it's for his job for the volunteer... and that's all they know), he winds up dead - which is probably actually better for him because he was going to be burned at the stake. Then Officer Luciano (Esme Squalor) introduces Detective Dupin (Count Olaf) and the Baudelaire's are arrested for Jacques murder.

The plan this time is to burn two of the Baudelaire's at the stake and have one "escape" before being kidnapped and having to live with Count Olaf until he can get their fortune. All three manage to escape from jail, figure out that the Quagmire triplets are being kept in the Fowl Fountain and rescue them and then head over to Hector's to escape on Hector's self sustaining hot air mobile home. I enjoyed the use of the couplets hiding the clues to where the Quagmire's were. I liked it even better when I managed to figure it out myself.

Although the five children make it to Hector's, only the Quagmire's make it aboard the mobile home. The Quagmire notebooks are destroyed when they try to throw them down and the only consolation is that by destroying the notebook, Luciana accidentally kills a crow. When the Village of Fowl Devotees realise, the mob mentality that worked so well for Luciana and Dupin turns against them and they find themselves having to flee.

And so the Baudelaire's are once again on their own. This time they don't wait for Mr Poe and just leave the village on their own. Honestly, I would've been out of there at least three books ago.

Like the last book, I'm left with so many more questions, not least of which is who the hell is Jacques and how does he fit into the equation? 3 stars.