I will be able to shop in Topshop.
I will be able to go swimming and not displace all the water and create a tsunami.
I will fit in changing rooms without banging my elbows or exposing the moon of my arse through the curtain when I bend over.
I will be able to fit behind the narrow benches at Ronnie Scott's to
listen to jazz instead of being offered a chair at the end of the row
I'll be able to see my toes, which I haven't seen since
1996 without the aid of a selfie stick.
...Read more
I will be able to shop in Topshop.
I will be able to go swimming and not displace all the water and create a tsunami.
I will fit in changing rooms without banging my elbows or exposing the moon of my arse through the curtain when I bend over.
I will be able to fit behind the narrow benches at Ronnie Scott's to
listen to jazz instead of being offered a chair at the end of the row
I'll be able to see my toes, which I haven't seen since
1996 without the aid of a selfie stick.
I will be promoted and not have my desk moved to
inside the stationery cupboard for being off-brand.
"I started writing this book five years ago. I was going through a really hard time - I lost my home and everything I owned - and the only way I got through it was by writing, and making myself laugh. I have always self-medicated with funny books, and wanted to write something that made women who might be miserable or cheated on or broke or feeling woefully unsuccessful feel a little better. The book is rooted in my reality: I always felt my life would start and I'd be happy once I reached my target weight. Then I got thin, and life was still rubbish and I still hated my body. I realised true happiness only comes with self-acceptance. So here it is. And I hope it at least makes you smile. And reach for that doughnut."
I will be able to go swimming and not displace all the water and create a tsunami.
I will fit in changing rooms without banging my elbows or exposing the moon of my arse through the curtain when I bend over.
I will be able to fit behind the narrow benches at Ronnie Scott's to
listen to jazz instead of being offered a chair at the end of the row
I'll be able to see my toes, which I haven't seen since
1996 without the aid of a selfie stick.
I will be promoted and not have my desk moved to
inside the stationery cupboard for being off-brand.
"I started writing this book five years ago. I was going through a really hard time - I lost my home and everything I owned - and the only way I got through it was by writing, and making myself laugh. I have always self-medicated with funny books, and wanted to write something that made women who might be miserable or cheated on or broke or feeling woefully unsuccessful feel a little better. The book is rooted in my reality: I always felt my life would start and I'd be happy once I reached my target weight. Then I got thin, and life was still rubbish and I still hated my body. I realised true happiness only comes with self-acceptance. So here it is. And I hope it at least makes you smile. And reach for that doughnut."
- ISBN13 9781910265994
- Publish Date 12 August 2021 (first published 12 April 2020)
- Publish Status Out of Print
- Out of Print 9 March 2023
- Publish Country GB
- Imprint Matthew James Publishing Ltd
- Format Paperback
- Pages 272
- Language English
