shannonmiz
4.5*
We Are Lost and Found is a truly moving book about a young gay man trying to discover who he is and who he wants to become at the dawn of the AIDS crisis. Here are some of the many reasons why it's worth reading:
- • The author does an amazing job of making the reader feel like we're in the midst of 1983 New York City. I wasn't aware of the world in 1983, nor that of the struggles of the gay community dealing with the bombshell that was AIDS. But the author brings it all to life so very vividly that I found myself completely immersed in it all. I never lived in a world without AIDS, I was born just a month before this book starts. But I do remember the stigma, even a decade (or more, to be true) later. There's still stigma, if we're being honest, though there shouldn't be. But when Michael is telling his story, it's the height of stigma. In fact, AIDS is only just being referred to as such (it had previously been dubbed Gay Related Immune Deficiency, or GRID, which is just... wow. This book puts the reader in the eyes of one gay man who is terrified, yes, but all those around him who are also experiencing these same fears and uncertainties.
- • The reader walks this journey with Michael. The book is told as a stream of thought from Michael, and it puts us firmly into his life, his feelings, his worries. We experience every emotion that Michael has living as a gay man whose family has a history of cruel and antipathetic response to this news. Michael doesn't have to guess how his parents will react to his being gay; they've already kicked out and virtually disowned his older brother Connor for the same reason. We experience the ups and downs of his friendships, his romantic desires and relationships, his fears, his hopes. His journey is presented in such a genuine, compassionate, and thoughtful way that it's impossible not to care for him.
- • Speaking of side characters, they're all incredibly well developed. Some of them you'll adore (like Becky and James, especially) and some you'll want to throttle (Michael's garbage parents, namely) but they all feel incredibly authentic. Michael's ever-changing relationship with Connor feels so relatable for all siblings. The only relationship, ironically, that I didn't feel a huge connection to was Michael's relationship with Gabriel. He was okay and I wanted Michael to be happy, but I just didn't feel a huge connection to him.
- • The Afterwords and Author's Note are incredibly moving. When this book was announced, I remember some backlash about whether this was the author's story to tell. After reading the afterwards from men who have lived this life and helped her with the book, and reading her own story, I think she did a tremendous job of giving a voice to these men (and gay men coming of age in this era in general), so I urge you to see for yourself. That said, I think an ownvoices novel in a similar vein would be incredible, and I am here for that as well.
Bottom Line: Emotionally charged and full of heart and love, this is a book that is sure to stay with me for a long time.