If You Find Me

by Emily Murdoch

What happens in the woods, stays in the woods. . .
Carey is keeping a terrible secret. If she tells, it could destroy her future. If she doesn't, will she ever be free?
For almost as long as she can remember, Carey has lived in a camper van in the heart of the woods with her drug-addicted mother and six-year-old sister, Jenessa. Her mother routinely disappears for weeks at a time, leaving the girls to cope alone. Survival is Carey's only priority - until strangers arrive and everything changes . . .

Jenny Downham, author of BEFORE I DIE, says that IF YOU FIND ME is "a beautiful book about survival, identity, family, love and so much more."

• ISBN10: 1250021529
• ISBN13: 9781250021526
• Publish Date: 26 March 2013
• Publish Status: Out of Print
• Out of Print: 26 October 2022
• Publish Country: US
• Imprint: St Martin's Press
• Format: Hardcover
• Pages: 256
• Language: English

Reviews

[nitzan_schwarz]

2013 cleaning my shelves challenge

4.5 stars
review to come

[Amber]

Full review on Books of Amber

If Judith has ever recommended this to you, raise your hand. If you've read it, then you pay lower your hand. Keep it up if you've ignored Judith's persistent tweeting, or have put off reading this due to being busy/having other books to read/not believing it's your thing. Is your hand still raised? Good. Now hit yourself with it.

I've said before that I love stories about family. That's more important to me than the high school dramas that revolve around love interests or the bitchy cheerleaders. All of that can be left out of a novel as long as the family aspect it there, and I will likely adore it. Tatum and I were talking the other night (while we cried over The Fast and the Furious) about how all the shows we love and most of the books we adore are about families in some form or another, whether it's talking about a huge extended family like Spartacus, or a small-but-still-good family like in Supernatural.

[violetpeanut]

Review to come

[Michael @ Knowledge Lost]

In a broken down camper, hidden in the forest, is where you will find Casey and Jenessa. Abducted by their bi-polar meth addicted mother ten years ago, the girls have learnt to survive on their own. Until one day their mother disappears for good and two strangers turn up. Suddenly the girls are expected to reintegrate into normal society. If You Find Me is part psychological thriller part Young Adult fiction.

I don’t think I’ve read a YA novel like this before, the survival aspects are handled really well and the whole concept of trying to live a normal life again after being taken away from society were handled really well. The best part; it’s a Young Adult novel that handles these topics that doesn’t have dystopian theme. I really enjoyed the psychological themes throughout this book and thought they were managed really well for a debut author like Emily Murdoch.

There are some parts of this book that I didn’t like, I personally felt like elements of Casey’s life were glossed over; there are mentions of sexual abuse that would be fairly traumatic but I didn’t think it was really explored. Also adorable little Jenessa has a major breakthrough in the book but it was predictable and I could see it coming for miles but then I never felt like it was explored enough; it happened and they all moved on like it never happened.

The concept and the plot are great and I think there are a lot of elements to love about this book. I might be one of the few people that probably thought there were parts that needed to be explored more and other parts that needed to be stripped back. Everything just ended up being unrealistically neat; I would have liked to see some more of the psychological, just to make sure everything isn’t too tidy.

If You Find Me is a great little young adult book from a fantastic new up-and-comer in this genre. I love that this book doesn’t feel like it has been done before. There are some real serious issues explored and for the most of it, it worked really well. For fans of Young Adult fiction, this is a must read for you and I hope this book ends up being a huge success.

This review originally appeared on my blog; http://literary-exploration.com/2013/03/12/book-review-if-you-find-me/

[Ashley]

BookNook — Young Adult book reviews

I assumed that If You Find Me would be emotionally gripping and different—just from the synopsis—and it certainly delivered! The whole idea behind this book is just so sad and crazy, but the most mind blowing part is that it could easily be real.

Carey is so fiercely dedicated to her sister Jenessa, and that is easily the best part of the book. Their relationship is so sweet, so tender, and so necessary; it's what kept them alive alone in the woods. And Carey is such a realistically strong character. She's not so strong that nothing bothers her (which I would call "unrealistically strong"); she still has insecurities, doubts, and fears. But she really takes life head on and deals with the hand she's been given.

I loved watching both characters transition into their new lives; they were both fascinating to watch in different ways. Jenessa adapts beautifully. As a six year old, she's young enough to forget about the past and just enjoy the wonderful new life she's been given. Carey, on the other hand, is still burdened by the hardships she has faced, and at times, she almost longs for her old life. More than once I found myself close to tears, whether it was because a memory was so sad, or because their new life was so wonderful, and I felt like they deserved it.

Good things come to those who let them in. All you have to do is take a chance.

But for me, one of the most interesting parts of the book was my torn feelings for Carey's mother. As a kidnapper, abuser, drug addict, and many other horrible things, her mother was a terrible character that I despised. But, Carey's mom also had shining moments of clarity where she dished out brilliant pearls of wisdom. In those moments, I couldn't help but love and admire her. It was kind of an awkward, totally messed up feeling. If it weren't for Carey's mother, they obviously would never have been in that horrible situation, but at the same time, if it weren't for those moments of clarity, their situation could have been so much worse. She encouraged Carey and Jenessa to be smart, intelligent, studious, and to take care of themselves. She constantly reminded them to not live like savages. At the end of the day, she was in no position to be taking care of kids, but I loved those few moments when I saw a different side to her. It's like they were glimpses of who she was before the drugs, the alcohol, and the insanity.

My one complaint about this book is how flashbacks are integrated; they made the book extremely confusing at times! Carey would be in the middle of a thought, and then she would suddenly switch to describing a flashback with no warning or heads up whatsoever. It made the book really confusing and disjointed. I often had to read entire pages two or three times because a guy would pop up out of nowhere and I'd try to figure out what the heck was going on. Then I'd finally realize, "Oh, this is a flashback." But the problem was that the flashbacks were so sudden and without any warning (no textual warning and no visual warning like a line break).

But overall, I really enjoyed If You Find Me. It's certainly a different story, and one that really made me think. Because in a way, it's totally scary to realize that this could totally and completely happen to someone, and that thought alone just breaks my heart.

[Suz @ Bookish Revelations]

Emily Murdoch pens one of the years most poignant and intriguing young adult novel, If You Find Me. Emotionally gripping and suspensefully stunning, If You Find Me will chill readers to the bone. It reads like a punch to the gut, touching on painful subjects of abuse and abandonment. The sensitivity and care that Emily Murdoch takes when developing the story, is one of the things that makes it a little bit easier to read the novel itself. Everything about this harrowing tale of greif, tragedy, and despair all seem to blend together seemlessly - the mystery, suspense, and intrigue make it truly stand out and bold tell a story of pain that has nowhere else to go but up.

The evils of the world are not masked by any means. Carey's world has been dark and bleak from the start, as she's thrown into a life full of turmoil and strife. Forced to grow up much earlier than she should have to, she's left to care for her half-sister Janessa for days, weeks, even months at a time; while her mother comes and goes. Carey is such an incredibly strong and intelligent character, one that I came to admire a lot while reading the book. She does what she has to do for herself and Janessa, since her mother who's dealing with her addiction to meth and her own mental illness, cannot function properly to provide the essential things that both her and her sister need to function normally. The things that Carey had to face while living in the small camper in the woods, were unbearable and unforgettable. Witnessing her trying to be strong enough to overcome these painful emotional scars is absolutely the most beautiful element of this tragic story.

Emily Murdoch writes the relationships within this novel in such a delicate and tender way, that make them incredibly beautiful and heart-aching to witness. The strength and vulnerability that she has related these characters and their heart-wrenching tale of sorrow to, is quite simply moving beyond the telling. With the hint of a slow-building potential romance in Carey's future, and a chance to re-build her own life as well as her sister's, If You Find Me will stir the hearts of reader's everywhere.