Mini Tantrums

I Would Like to Apologize to Anyone I Haven't Offended Yet. Please Be Patient. I Will Get to You Shortly.

Some People Just Need a Sympathetic Pat .. on the Head .. with a Hammer

I Like Books Better Than People

B.I.T.C.H. Beautiful Intelligent Talented Cute Hot

They Told Me I Couldn't. That's Why I Did!

Since It's Difficult to Infer Tone in an Email, You Should Assume All Mine Are Sarcastic or Bitchy

Row Row Row Your Boat Gently the F*ck Away from Me

Lord, Give Me The Strength To Ignore The Dumb I Can Not Smother

Just Because I'm Awake Doesn't Mean I Am Ready to Do Things

Its Beginning to Look a Lot Like F*ck This

Cute But Psycho Things Even Out

And Though She Be But Little She Is Fierce

Like A Good Neighbor Stay Over There

You're Having A Nice Day? Tell Me About It So I Can Ruin It

I'm Sorry I Can't Explain This To You Again..

If You're Not Weird Don't Expect Me to Understand You

If I Am Silent It's Because There Is a Thunder Inside of Me. Or, I'm Just Chillin, It Depends. May the Odds Be Ever in Your Favor

Your Gift Is In The Litterbox

I'm Sorry for Whatever I Did to Make You Think I Give a Sh*t about Your Feelings

Some Days the Supply Fo Available Curse Words Is Insufficient to Meet My Demands.

There Is No Angry Way to Say Bubbles

I Work Hard So My Cat Can Have a Better Life. Good! I Trained You Right

When You Get Angry Take a Breathe and Count to 10. Throw a Punch at 8. They Never See It Coming.

To Change Everything, It Takes Everyone