Sassy Sarcastic Journal Publishing

You Are about to Exceed the Limits of My Medication

I Have Not Lost My Mind. Half of It Just Wandered Off and the Other Half Went Looking for It

That Moment When You Flex Your Foot Wrong and It Cramps.. You Think "this Is It. This Is How It Ends"

Don't Bother Walking a Mile in My Shoes, That Would Be Boring. Spend 30 Seconds in My Head, That'll Freak You Right Out

Who Sprinkled the Bitch Dust?

Mom of Sassholes

People Should Seriously Stop Expecting Normal from Me... Stop Acting Like You Don't Know Who You're Dealing with Here

My Bed Is a Magical Place Where I Suddenly Remember Everything I Was Supposed to Do

One Day I'm Gonna Make Onions Cry

Coffee Spelled Backwards Is Eefoc. Just Know That I Don't Give Eefoc Until I've Had My Coffee.

Don't Bother Walking a Mile in My Shoes, Spend 30 Seconds in My Head, That'll Freak You Right Out

I Get Paid to Be Nice at Work. Not Sure Why My Friends and Family Expect That Shit for Free

I Love the Smell of Freshly Brewed Coffee in the Morning. and I Love the Sound of No One Talking to Me While I Drink It