Maturity meant accepting the infinite expanse of existence, that there were many things one would never know or do...he'd started to catalog them-a bucket list in reverse: how to play mahjongg, paint, juggle, read Attic Greek; wine; gems; caves; string theory.cw: suicide
3.5 stars.
It is Millard Salter's 75th birthday, and the day he has decided to end his life. Not because he is sick or depressed, but because he doesn't see life getting any better and wants to end it on at a good point. [b:Millard Salter's Last Day|34079360|Millard Salter's Last Day|Jacob M. Appel|https://images.gr-assets.com/books/1509878944s/34079360.jpg|55090021] follows his last day, seemingly mundane other than his evening plans. He goes to work, reconnects with people from his past, spends time mentoring a medical student. But as the day progresses weird things come up, almost as if God or the Universe has differing plans.
Like Appel's other work that I have read, there is an undercurrent of philosophy that is just below the surface, hardly noticeable to readers that are not versed or interested. While the subject matter of this novel is intensely dark, Appel manages to keep the narrative almost "light" without making light of the situation at hand.
Overall I enjoyed this book; it is a unique narrative. Millard and the reader both know that this is his last day, but no one else that he interacts with does. Ultimately that was the main thing that bothered me about the story: Millard does not take into consideration the hole that he will leave behind. There was a part of me that appreciated the story for what it was: a man ending his life on his own terms, but there was also the part of me bothered with his making promises that he had no intention of keeping. I couldn't help but think about how some of the characters that I got to know through Millard's last day would react the following day, and the confusion they would feel. But at the end of the day I think that is largely the point Appel was making with this choice- most of the time those left behind after suicide have no explanation, and often actions in the days leading up to it give no warning. It is a harsh reality and a sad pill for me to swallow.
Thank you to the author, Jacob Appel, for sending me a free copy of this book in exchange for my honest review.