Not If I See You First

by Eric Lindstrom

[Angie]

Not If I See You First was a pretty great read! I was really excited for it, because Parker sounded like a fun, feisty character who doesn’t take any nonsense from anybody, and won’t let you get away with using her blindness against her. Well, someone did use her blindness to hurt her, and now three years later, Scott is back. Parker wants nothing to do with him, but soon enough she finds out what really happened, and maybe she was too quick to cut him out of her life.

It did take me a little while to warm up to Parker. She is fun and feisty, but she’s also super prickly, and at times a straight up jerk. However, this is all part of her character growth. She realizes that she’s not always the nicest and that she’s too quick to judge people as not being good enough to be in her life. Not If I See You First is very much a story about learning to see beyond your own personal bubble. Parker has a few moments where people call her out on her crap, or say things that make her see how she tends to be more concerned about herself rather than those around her.

Not If I See You First also has an amazing friendship development! I loved witnessing Parker and Molly become friends! Molly is actually assigned to be Parker’s class buddy, helping her in the classroom and with getting her homework done. At first, Parker does kind of talk about her like she’s training a dog. She never says those words, but that’s definitely the vibe I got from her. But Molly is learning about what Parker needs and doesn’t need, and there’s no way she can just know these things without Parker letting her know. Parker eventually does open up to Molly, and Molly opens up to Parker, and I feel like we need a big group hug! I also felt like those two had a lot more chemistry than Parker and Scott did.

Not If I See You First also deals a lot with grief and forgiveness. Parker’s father died three months ago, but she won’t let herself cry. She has to be strong and go on with her life. Of course, that strategy isn’t going to last forever. I felt awful when what she thought was a coping mechanism, really didn’t work. I’m glad she had her friends there though to help her through it. They also helped her see how her treatment of Scott wasn’t exactly fair, not that she didn’t have every right to be upset, but she never heard his side of the story because she pretended like he didn’t exist at all.

I really enjoyed Not If I See You First. I liked getting a glimpse into what the world is like for a blind person. Parker is able to do so much on her own, but isn’t afraid to ask for help when she does need it (but don’t just jump in and assume she needs help!). I also loved that all of the themes were totally universal and relatable. You don’t have to be physically blind to be blind to the people around you. We’re all not mind readers, it takes time to get to know someone, and it takes asking questions of them and offering up answers yourself. There is a bit of an open ending, but I think it’s pretty obvious what comes next.

Read more of my reviews at Pinkindle Reads & Reviews.