How to Make Out by Brianna R. Shrum

How to Make Out

by Brianna R. Shrum

Sixteen-year-old Renley needs three thousand dollars for the math club’s trip to New York City, and she knows exactly how to get it: she’s going to start a how-to blog where people pay for answers to all of life’s questions from a “certified expert.” The only problems: 1) She doesn’t know how to do anything but long division and calculus. 2) She’s totally invisible to people at school. And not in a cool Gossip Girl kind of way.

So, she decides to learn to do . . . well . . . everything. When her anonymous blog shifts in a more scandalous direction and the questions (and money) start rolling in, she has to learn not just how to do waterfall braids and cat-eye makeup, but a few other things, like how to cure a hangover, how to flirt, and how to make out (something her very experienced, and very in-love-with-her neighbor, Drew, is more than willing to help with).

As her blog’s reputation skyrockets, so does “new and improved” Renley’s popularity. She’s not only nabbed the attention of the entire school, but also the eye of Seth Levine, the hot culinary wizard she’s admired from across the home-ec classroom all year.

Soon, caught up in the thrill of popularity both in and out of cyberspace, her secrets start to spiral, and she finds that she’s forgotten the most important how-to: how to be herself. When her online and real lives converge, Renley will have to make a choice: lose everything she loves in her new life, or everyone she loves in the life she left behind.

Reviewed by layawaydragon on

1 of 5 stars

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Received a free copy to review.

I was interested after reading the blurb because nerd girl gets popular is a trope I have soft spot for and a blogger? Oh yes.

Except nerd girl really isn’t nerdy and the whole blog set up was unbelievable.

The Good:
+Girl good at math!
+I liked Renley's got realistic problems, issues, and effects on her psychologically

The Bad & The Other:
-Unbelievable blog set-up
-Love-angle, felt really bad for both these guys
-Renley was unlikable & didn’t seem to change or grow much

Renley doesn't want to go on this trip, but her better-off, one and only femal friend needs her to go. Renley's mother left and has a new family, her father remarried a girl around her age, and her best-friend Drew is an attractive "manwhore" that's in love with her. She's coasting along in her life sleeping next to said best-friend, crushing on a popular boy Seth, and being a math geek doing whatever she wants because her father won't discipline her.

Renley has a lightbulb moment one night and *poof* has a blog set up with a post published before Drew wakes up. As if that wasn’t bad enough, her blog stats start going crazy early. She’s searching Google for how-to’s, re-posting the same fucking thing and *poof* has a following! She's making money!

She’s bringing nothing unique, recycling content from others, and admittedly knows nothing. This is magic fairy land of blogging. I thought from the blurb it’d be more realistic and edgier, but…nope.

The “scandalous” nature of the blog is making out (kissing, no heavy petting) and how to give a hand job. That’s it. With the mention of Gossip Girl, I assumed something more. And again, the how to give a hand job was glossed over and of course she knocked it out of the park…

*sigh*

Where is the awkward learning phase? The funny mishaps and misunderstandings? Why is Ms. Innocently Perfect at all this "bad" stuff? Supposedly tackling hard issues and glossing over it is harmful, stupid, and contradictory. Don't bring this stuff to be "edgy" if you're not going to follow through.

The family problems -divorce, remarriage, estrangement- is treated like an excuse for her to cause drama but has it's moments. I did like how Renley and her step-mother talked towards the end when things inevitably come crashing down and shatters the family silence.

In the end, you’d really have to turn your brain off and let all the improbable situations go to enjoy How to Make Out but it’s not a light and fun contemporary. It’s like Loser/Queen with family issues, minus the mystery and a consistently unlikable protagonist.

So Skip It.

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Reading updates

  • Started reading
  • 23 August, 2016: Finished reading
  • 23 August, 2016: Reviewed