The How & the Why by Cynthia Hand

The How & the Why

by Cynthia Hand

"Cynthia Hand is the master of pulling at your heartstrings. The How & the Why tells both sides of an adoption story with love, compassion, and care." —Brigid Kemmerer, New York Times bestselling author of Letters to the Lost

A poignant exploration of family and the ties that bind, from New York Times bestselling author Cynthia Hand.

Cassandra McMurtrey has the best parents a girl could ask for; they’ve given Cass a life she wouldn’t trade for the world. She has everything she needs—but she has questions, too. Like, to know who she is. Where she came from. Questions her adoptive parents can’t answer, no matter how much they love her.

But eighteen years ago, someone wrote Cass a series of letters. And they may just hold the answers Cass has been searching for.

Alternating between Cass’s search for answers and letters from the pregnant teen who placed her for adoption, this emotionally resonant narrative is the perfect read for fans of Nina LaCour and Jandy Nelson.

Reviewed by shannonmiz on

5 of 5 stars

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You can find the full review and all the fancy and/or randomness that accompanies it at It Starts at Midnight

This book is phenomenal and will make you feel so many things that your emotions might actually explode but you'll be okay with it cause it's worth it. I mean, I almost don't want to tell you much about it because I just want you to go ahead and experience it for yourself? I'll try to give you a little idea of why you must.

  • • FAMILY. Can I be any clearer that this novel is straight up overflowing with family? Because it is. In so many ways. Examples of awesome families (like perhaps the actual best I have ever read about?) and some that are... less so. The point is, it's brimming with love and heart, and when is that not a great thing?


  • • So many complex relationships! Again, keeping it vague purposely, but there will be so many relationships in both times, for both women, that are just incredible. There's a focus on friendships, romances, and family dynamics that are so well-developed that you simply cannot help but care about how they play out.


  • • The adoption stories, from both mother and child's perspectives are incredible. And yes, there will be feels, obviously. But they're multifaceted, and I will leave it at that. Honestly please just read the thing.


  • • It's still, at its core, a coming of age story about both Cass and her mother. And while all of these huge life changes are happening in their respective lives/respective times, they're also living their daily lives, navigating growing into adulthood. And it's great to see that dichotomy in play.


Bottom Line: Gosh please just read this and experience all the lovely feels! You can  thank me later.

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Reading updates

  • Started reading
  • 2 October, 2019: Finished reading
  • 2 October, 2019: Reviewed