A Small Madness

by Dianne Touchell

[Kelly]

http://www.divabooknerd.com/2015/02/a-small-madness-by-dianne-touchell.html

Please note, this review contains spoilers. It's a sensitive subject, so please read at your own peril. I have chosen not to rate A Small Madness, due to the emotional content and how this book effected me personally.

If you've recently given birth, miscarried or trying to start a family, then look away now. This book needs to come with a warning. It's horrific, it's disturbing and sadly, also realistic. Told as a narrative, it follows the lives of Rose and Michael, two teens in love who have decided to have sex for the first time, unprotected despite warnings and given protection from a sibling and peers. The cycle continues until Rose finds she's missed her period, relying on her best friend to purchase a pregnancy test and discovers she's now pregnant. She's told by the same friend that she's ruined Michael's life, he was going places and that she's better off not telling him and to consider an abortion. But rather than deal with the pregnancy, Rose is in denial. Telling Michael, he pulls away, angry that she's put him in this position and his first thought is disappointing his father.

Their relationship is virtually non existent, as Rose slowly starts to break down. The once intelligent girl with the bright future is on a destructive path to self harm and illness. This is where I became emotional. The two teens refused to use protection. If you're emotionally mature enough to begin a sexual relationship, then you're also old enough to deal with the consequences. Being a teen parent is life changing, but in no means will not ruin your life. So Rose simply sees the pregnancy as a virus her body needs to expel, and this is where the storyline began to enrage me.

Her mother could see the changes in her daughter, but refused to acknowledge that it was beyond the stress of exams that was causing the illness. Michael also became aggressive, retreating from family discussions around the table and began skipping classes. He was angry, and rather than delve into what was troubling him, his father baited him to assert his own authority. By this point, I'm fuming. Both families clearly as delusional as the other and failing both their children. They're both scared and angry, but none more so than Rose. She never saw her pregnancy as a child, but something she needed to rid her body of.

She went as far as to research how miscarriages occurred, began smoking to stop blood flow and stunt the baby's growth, refusing to eat as not to gain weight and taking large amounts of ibuprofen medication in the hopes to destroy the fetus. This is where I lost any respect I had for her or her situation. It's never clear that Rose is suffering from a mental illness, and I can understand how fear can cause destruction, but I couldn't see her as anything less than monstrous.

Her pregnancy was almost at full term when she finally miscarried. She seemed relieved that she'd finally overcome what she was determined to achieve. At home, she could have bled out and called Michael, the almost full term still born child was buried by both teens.

I was determined to see this storyline through, and continued to read through my tears. As a woman on the verge of starting my own family, this read left me an emotional mess. Never have I read anything so confronting, disturbing and unable to tear myself away. One small comfort is that justice is somewhat served, but this isn't a book I'm likely to ever forget. And I'm not sure it's for entirely the right reasons. It's raw, powerful and will knock you out of your comfort zone. It'll rip your heart out and leave you emotionally distraught.