The Million Pieces of Neena Gill

by Emma Smith-Barton

[Kelly]

Be happy. That was the last words Akash Gill told his sister Neena before disappearing that night, asking her to sneak out to a party with him. It's been seven months since he left, seven months since Neena's mother has left the house, seven months since their lives were irrevocably changed. Neena has always been a model student and loyal friend, navigating the world with Akash at her side. Since he disappeared, Neena's life is no longer her own. She sneaks out to meet his former girlfriend Fiona, hoping to find information on why he left, drinking to numb the pain and follow Akash's path, living life according to where the winds blow. Not how their parents dictate.

Neena Gill is an interesting character, her grief is palpable as we discover the impact Akash's disappearance had on the quiet and reserved young woman. Neena increasingly isolated herself from her best friend Raheela and although as a result of her unimaginable longing, Neena meets Josh at a party through Fiona, her brother's former girlfriend and the two instantly hit it off. Neena is quite the unreliable narrator, shaking off her so called good girl status in the pursuit of information. At first. She becomes a fixture in Akash's social scene, soon realising there was more to her brother than the artist, the covert party boy, a son, a boyfriend and the spark that set the world ablaze.

The Million Pieces of Neena Gill explores the turbulent and often confronting themes of grief, alcoholism, mental illness and substance abuse, issues that were beautifully written with incredible care and consideration. It also portrays the expectations placed upon the offspring of immigrant parents and I really enjoyed the interactions between Neena and her Pakistani born parents once they found common ground.

Although the reader is introduced to Akash through brief snippets and Neena's memories of their childhood, his character is larger than life. The storyline slowly navigates around his character as the central focus and how the disappearance of a loved one leaves a gaping hole in the lives of friends and loved ones. It also explores the many facets of grief, denial, isolation, destructive behaviour, self sabotage, depression and anxiety. Neena's mother developed agoraphobia and was unable to leave the house, the couple's friends coming over each night to banquets Neena's mother would spend the day preparing, Neena's father spending long hours at work to avoid the confrontation of home while seeking solace in his local church to pray for his wayward daughter.

The romance plays a very small role throughout the narrative, which I appreciated tremendously. Neena's life is complex enough and although her relationship with Josh brought her joy, it was a bandaid for a much larger issue. Josh's character was lovely, gentle with Neena and genuinely cares for her. Her brother's former girlfriend Fiona appears to be unlikeable and not only enabled Neena's behaviour but manipulated Neena and used her to her advantage. Neena often perceived her world and the interactions with others entirely different to how they were portrayed, Fi is still questionably sketchy as she's strongly disliked by Neena's parents and her former best friend Raheela but also struggled with life without Akash.

One of my favourite aspects of The Million Pieces of Neena Gill was the writing. It was beautiful and well considered. A story of hope, healing and learning to live in the moment. A deeply moving, poignant and quietly stunning prose from an brilliant debut author in Emma Smith - Barton.