Dortmunder

7 primary works • 15 total works

Bank Shot

by Donald E Westlake

Published 17 July 1972

With the help of an unusual set of cronies, bank robber John Dortmunder puts a set of wheels under a trailer that just happens to be the temporary site of the Capitalists' & Immigrants' Trust and hauls it away. But when the safe won't open and the cops get close, Dortmunder realizes he's got to find a place to ditch the "bank".

Jimmy the Kid

by Donald E Westlake

Published 15 January 1974

Bungling burglar John Dortmunder and his merry band of thieves are back in another classic, comic crime novel from the award-winning author of the new hardcover Baby, Would I Lie? Dortmunder and his gang plan to kidnap precocious kid Jimmy Harrington with the help of a crime novel outlining the perfect caper.

Nobody's Perfect

by Donald E Westlake

Published 15 January 1977

Why Me?

by Donald E Westlake

Published 27 January 1983

Good Behavior

by Donald E Westlake

Published 1 May 1986

Drowned Hopes

by Donald E Westlake

Published 1 April 1990

Bumbling comic criminal John Dortmunder is in hot water as he tries to keep a nasty old man from blowing up a dam to unearth $750,000. Dortmunder must devise a safer scheme to get the loot . . . before the old coot's trigger finger gets too itchy. "Entertainment of the highest order".--San Diego Tribune.

Get Real

by Donald E Westlake

Published 1 July 2009

In Westlake's classic caper novels, the bad get better, the good slide a bit, and Lord help anyone caught between a thief named John Dortmunder and the current object of his attention. However, being caught red-handed is inevitable in Dortmunder's next production, when a TV producer convinces this thief and his merry gang to star in a reality TV show that captures their next score. The producer guarantees to find a way to keep the show from being used in evidence against them. They're dubious, but the pay is good, so they take him up on his offer. As the gang plans their next move with the cameras rolling, Dortmunder and his sidekick sneak onto the roof of their new studio to organize a private enterprise. It will take an ingenious plan to outwit viewers glued to their TV sets, but Dortmunder is determined to end this shoot with a good deal of money in his pockets.

The Hot Rock

by Donald E Westlake

Published 11 January 1971

Edgar Award Finalist: Fresh out of prison, John Dortmunder plans a heist that could mean war in this thriller by Mystery Writers of America Grand Master Donald E. Westlake. John Dortmunder leaves jail with ten dollars, a train ticket, and nothing to make money on but his good name. Thankfully, his reputation goes far. No one plans a caper better than Dortmunder. His friend Kelp picks him up in a stolen Cadillac and drives him away from Sing-Sing, telling a story of a $500,000 emerald that they just have to steal. Dortmunder doesn't hesitate to agree. The emerald is the crown jewel of a former British colony, lately granted independence and split into two nations: one for the Talabwo people, one for the Akinzi. The Akinzi have the stone, the Talabwo want it back, and their UN representative offers a fine payday to the men who can get it. It's not a simple heist, but after a few years in stir, Dortmunder could use the challenge.

The Road to Ruin

by Donald E Westlake

Published 6 April 2004

Having set up a con on Monroe Hall, a fabulously wealthy and corrupt CEO, John Dortmunder and his hapless gang of crooks suddenly find themselves caught in the deadly crossfire between their would-be mark Hall and his own victims.

Bad News

by Donald E Westlake

Published 1 January 2001

Dortmunder and his usual companions, whilst busy proving that crime does not pay, find themselves involved with felonies both high and low. What begins as a simple grave robbery escalates into high-stakes confrontations at an American Indian gambling casino, a burglary that's such a perfect crime no one realizes it happened, and assaults on the infallibility of DNA testing so complex even the characters are left wondering whose head they're scratching. Through thick and thin John Dortmunder as usual prevails - more or less. Out of the skier-infested slopes of New York State through storm and fire, through city and country slickers, past a judge whose only prayer is that he never meets an interesting case, Dortmunder slogs on, with or without the bacon. For him, getting there is all the fun. It's a good thing his faithful companion, May, has kept her day job.

Watch Your Back!

by Donald E Westlake

Published 1 April 2005

It's the score of a lifetime: easy access to a lavish New York City apartment, hordes of valuables, and an absentee owner avoiding the lawyers of his unhappy ex-wives. But before they pull the job, Dortmunder's crew is startled to find their beloved gin joint, the OJ, in the clutches of the Mafia - who consider it perfect for a little fraud, courtesy of a nice big fire. For tactical and highly superstitious reasons, the fate of the OJ is ever more important to the crew than the enormous score. Now, Dortmunder and his gang are determined to split their time, fighting the mob and robbing the rich simultaneously.

What's the Worst That Could Happen?

by Donald E Westlake

Published 1 October 1996

It started with a ring. A cheap ring. The yellow metal said brass, not gold, and the sparkly bits were certainly not diamonds. But the ring belonged to May's horseplaying uncle, who swore it brought good luck. Dortmunder, who wouldn't kick a little good luck out of bed, puts it to the test when he goes to burglarize Long Island billionaire Max Fairbanks. As luck would have it, Dortmunder is greeted by Fairbanks himself - and a loaded gun - as soon as he strolls through the door. When the cops arrive, the mogul adds insult to injury by claiming that Dortmunder's lucky ring is actually his. Big mistake, big guy. As soon as Dortmunder can give the cops the slip, the world's most single-minded burglar goes after the fat cat with a vengeance and a team of crooks that only he can assemble. And from the get go everything will go Dortmunder's way - everything, that is, except the ring.

Don't Ask

by Donald E Westlake

Published 1 April 1993

In his latest comic crime caper, Dortmunder is hired to steal a bone, but not any old bone . . .

Dortmunder has a job offer. He's been hired by third parties to pull off heists in the past, but never to lay his hands on anything this peculiar. It is the 800 year old femur of a 16-year-old girl who who, having been killed and eaten by her own family, was made a saint by the Church. Now two European countries and the Catholic church are fighting like dogs over it. This bone, the femur of St Ferghana, is a holy relic claimed by two newly-created European nations, Tsergovia and Votskojek. The relic will be awarded to one of the two countries, which will then be admitted to the United Nations. Dortmunder and his gang are working for the Tersgovians.

As usual, nothing goes according to plan. How will this free-for-all end?

Don't ask.

What's So Funny?

by Donald E Westlake

Published 1 April 2007

John Dortmunder hasn't gotten where he is today by turning a blind eye to an easy heist. But he also knows an impossible job when it comes along. So when an ex-cop named Eppick presents him with a job that involves stealing a bejewelled, solid gold chess set, a chess set weighing more than one man can carry, from an underground vault in a Manhattan bank, Dortmunder says no thanks. Eppick says steal the chess set or go to jail for previous crimes. So John and his bumbling band of good natured thieves put together a plan. But is it a workable plan?

Bad News Bad News

by Donald E Westlake

Published 11 April 2001