Toffee

by Sarah Crossan

WINNER OF THE BOOKS ARE MY BAG YA AWARD 2019

The astonishing new novel from the incomparable, multi-award-winning and Laureate na nÓg Sarah Crossan.

I am not who I say I am.
Marla isn’t who she thinks she is.

I am a girl trying to forget.
Marla is a woman trying to remember.

Allison has run away from home and with nowhere to live finds herself hiding out in the shed of what she thinks is an abandoned house. But the house isn’t empty. An elderly woman named Marla, with dementia, lives there – and she mistakes Allison for an old friend from her past called Toffee.

Allison is used to hiding who she really is, and trying to be what other people want her to be. And so, Toffee is who she becomes. After all, it means she has a place to stay. There are worse places she could be.

But as their bond grows, and Allison discovers how much Marla needs a real friend, she begins to ask herself –where is home? What is a family? And most importantly, who am I, really?

• ISBN10: 1408868121
• ISBN13: 9781408868126
• Publish Date: 2 May 2019
• Publish Status: Out of Print
• Out of Print: 3 March 2021
• Publish Country: GB
• Publisher: Bloomsbury Publishing PLC
• Imprint: Bloomsbury YA
• Format: Hardcover
• Pages: 416
• Language: English

Reviews

[shannonmiz]

You can find the full review and all the fancy and/or randomness that accompanies it at It Starts at Midnight

4.5*

I have truly never been this moved by a novel in verse before. Never, ever. Usually even if I really enjoy one, I have a slight disconnect, but not in this case. Being Toffee won me over completely. It's an incredibly intense (and I'll go ahead and put a trigger warning here for abuse before we start) story about a young woman named Allison who runs away from home to escape the abuse her father has been inflicting on her. In running though, she finds herself homeless, and a quest to find a place to be safe and sheltered becomes her primary concern.

When she thinks she finds a place to rest, it turns out it's not empty, but occupied by an elderly woman with dementia who happens to think Allison her old friend Toffee. And look, from the sound of it, I was iffy! You can't help but think "okay am I really going to feel for this girl who's messing with a dementia patient?" but I promise it isn't like that at all. It's so much more nuanced, and so full of heart and love and desperation. 

I felt so deeply for both Allison and Marla, grew to love and care for both women so much throughout the story. It's so much more than meets the eye, and the author does a phenomenal job developing the characters and the story with impeccable care. I also thought that the atmosphere and tone of the story were fabulous- it's set in a beach town, and it's definitely a well-painted picture. In addition, the author makes the emotions just ooze off the page.

The only minor qualm I had with the story was that I had wanted the ending to be a bit... more? But I also know from the authors' previous works that I think this is just how she does endings and I have to live with that! It's still worth it because the book is absolutely that good.

Bottom Line: At once a heartbreaking and heartwarming story, you simply will not be able to help falling in love with these characters and their story.

[Kelly]

Allison Daniels is searching for a place to stay, discovering what she believes is a vacant outbuilding on an abandoned property to rest her weary body. Compelled to find her former stepmother and the only person who understands the abusive and adverse environment inflicted upon Allison, her meagre possessions are stolen and determined not to return to her abusive father, seeks shelter on the dilapidated property.

Allison is a family violence survivor, her father a neglectful and abusive man since the passing of his wife moments after delivering Allison. As a child, Allison learnt to become independent from a young age and through parental neglect, begun caring for her father and the household. In a series of revolving partners, it was Kelly Anne who befriended Allison while dating her father, soon becoming a companion and confidant for Allison. Unable to withstand the abuse and manipulation, Kelly Anne abandons the family home and Allison, who now endures the constant anger of her father. Her experience is profoundly resonating and I empathised with Allison and the anguish family violence inflicts upon victims.

Marla is an elderly woman with dementia and owns the neglected property. Lonely and confused, she mistakes Allison for her childhood friend Toffee and despite Allison insisting otherwise, she understands the fragility of Marla's condition and allows her to believe she's the childhood companion Marla desperately needs. Marla is representative of our elderly communities, the forgotten and often neglected members of society. Marla is a dementia patient and although she experiences moments of clarity, she regresses to a simpler time, reminiscent of her years as a sprightly young woman. I can imagine Marla as a confident and flirtatious young woman and in her moments of clarity, she's incredibly joyous and endearing. As the narrative progresses, we're introduced to her carer who is seemingly only interested in performing a elemental service, her son is abusive, degrading Marla and creating an environment where Marla is agitated and frightened.

Throughout the narrative, Allison and Marla become friends and although at times Marla is bewildered at the new living arrangements, they begin to care and cherish one another's company. My heart ached for Marla and I could sympathise with Allison's decision to allow Marla to believe she was her once childhood friend. Marla seemingly felt more at ease and it allowed her to become the spirited and adventurous young woman she once was. Toffee also encourages the discussion of themes rarely referenced in young adult literature, dementia, the negligent attitude towards the senior members of our communities, abuse, abandonment and impoverishment.

Poignant, compelling and achingly beautiful, Toffee is a delicate and tender verse narrative of compassion and companionship. Essential reading.