The Survival List

by Courtney Sheinmel

“Nobody writes about family secrets with the grace, compassion, and intrigue of Courtney Sheinmel.” —Leila Sales, author of This Song Will Save Your Life

Fans of I Was Here by Gayle Forman and Far from the Tree by Robin Benway will be floored by this heartbreaking yet uplifting teen novel about a grieving girl who follows a mysterious list across the country after her older sister’s death.

Sloane Weber is devastated when her older sister dies by suicide. Talley was a bright light who made everyone want to step closer. Why had she made that unthinkable choice?

The only clue Talley left behind for Sloane is a puzzle—a list of random places and names, along with the phone number of a boy named Adam, who lives in California and claims he didn’t know Talley.

Sloane heads west, enlists Adam’s help, and together they search for answers. But while Sloane is drawn to Adam, she can’t shake the feeling that he’s hiding something. Is Sloane ready to learn the truth—about Adam, her sister, or the secrets her family has been hiding for years?

• ISBN10: 0062655000
• ISBN13: 9780062655004
• Publish Date: 31 October 2019 (first published 17 September 2019)
• Publish Status: Active
• Out of Print: 22 August 2023
• Publish Country: US
• Publisher: HarperCollins Publishers Inc
• Imprint: HarperCollins
• Format: Hardcover
• Pages: 320
• Language: English

Reviews

[Sam@WLABB]

Sloane never thought the day she went to school, instead of skipping, would be the last time she would see her sister. She knew Talley was struggling with depression, but never realize how dire things actually were. Now, Sloane was left with many questions and a list of seemingly random things, which she hoped would lead to some answers. She never realized this list would help her learn more about her sister, her aunt, her mother, and herself.

Sheinmel never fails to hit me in the feels, and she had me shedding quite a few tears as I read this book. I think suicide is such a difficult topic, but I though Sheinmel did a beautiful job in presenting how it affected the ones, who were left behind.

I enjoyed many things in this book, and here are my top five:

1. Sisterly Bonds - Not only did I get to explore the relationship between Talley and Sloane, but I also got to enjoy the sisterly friendship between Sloane and her best friend, Juno. Both relationships were very special, and I was happy to witness so many lovely moments between them.

2. Grief and Guilt - Does anyone, who loses a loved one to suicide NOT feel some degree of guilt? Sloane's guilt regarding her actions prior to her sister's death and the disappointment in herself in not recognizing the cry for help was heartbreaking. Sheinmel did a fantastic job getting me into Sloane's headspace, and I felt like I was experiencing her emotional turmoil right alongside her.

3. A List and a Puzzle - The list seemed so random, and I enjoyed being with Sloane as she slowly figured out the significance of each entry, which would bring her closer and closer to learning more about her sister's final months. There were some wrong turns and some red herrings, which really had me wondering about Tally, but eventually, we got the whole story, and it was sad, but satisfying.

4. Adam, a Lovely Soft Boy - Adam initially seemed so random, but I still liked him right away. There was something wonderful about him, and I was happy he was there to help Sloane figure out the entries on the list. I was really surprised by how Adam figured into the big picture, and I thought Sheinmel wove that whole part into the plot quite well.

5. Healing and Forgiveness - This story was filled with many people, who were riddled with grief and guilt, but the author allowed for lots of forgiveness, and had the characters actively working through their pain and towards a bit of healing. I was especially pleased with many of the developments between Sloane and her family, as well as between Adam and his.

Overall:

I found this to be a rather thoughtful look at how those, who are left behind, pick up the pieces following the suicide of a loved one. The pain, the grief, the self-blaming was so heartbreaking, and therefore, I was grateful that Sloane had this last challenge from her sister, which allowed her to uncover some family secrets, mend some broken bridges, make some new connections, and begin to heal.

*ARC provided in exchange for an honest review.

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