Island Girl

Divorce

Keep f*cking going

Mood Journal

Me

Not only does my mind wander.. Sometimes it walks off completely.

Never pick a fight with a woman over 40. They are full of rage & sick of everyone's shit.

SASSY (adj.) describes a flirty, self confident, lovable woman, yet classy, elegant, and chic

I don't need THERAPY. I just need to go on VACATION.

I'm the lady with the vocabulary of a well educated sailor.

This woman runs on caffeine, Target, and AMAZON PRIME.

I'm not insulting you. I'm describing you.

Being related to me is the only gift you need

Mom is not always right, but she is never ever wrong.

Of course I talk to myself. Sometimes I need expert advice.

Wise men talk because they have something to say. Fools talk because they have to say something.

Brains, Beauty & Badass Determination.

I speak fluent SARCASM

Well apparently rock bottom has a basement.

WOMEN Half the population All of the brains

If you can read this, you're too close.

PARALEGAL (noun) SOMEONE WHO SOLVES A PROBLEM YOU DIDN'T KNOW YOU HAD IN A WAY YOU DO NOT UNDERSTAND. SEE ALSO WIZARD, MAGICIAN.

My sister has the best sister

I am someone's crazy aunt

I always get what I want