10 Things I Can See From Here

by Carrie Mac

Perfect for fans of John Green's Turtles All the Way Down and Nina LaCour's We Are Okay, this is the poignant and uplifting story of Maeve, who is dealing with anxiety while falling in love with a girl who is not afraid of anything.
 
Think positive.
Don’t worry; be happy.
Keep calm and carry on.
 
Maeve has heard it all before. She’s been struggling with severe anxiety for a long time, and as much as she wishes it was something she could just talk herself out of, it’s not. She constantly imagines the worst, composes obituaries in her head, and is always ready for things to fall apart. To add to her troubles, her mom—the only one who really gets what Maeve goes through—is leaving for six months, so Maeve will be sent to live with her dad in Vancouver.
 
Vancouver brings a slew of new worries, but Maeve finds brief moments of calm (as well as even more worries) with Salix, a local girl who doesn’t seem to worry about anything. Between her dad’s wavering sobriety, her very pregnant stepmom insisting on a home birth, and her bumbling courtship with Salix, this summer brings more catastrophes than even Maeve could have foreseen. Will she be able to navigate through all the chaos to be there for the people she loves?


An ALA Rainbow Book List selection
A Bank Street Best Book of the Year

"With Maeve, Mac delivers a character who's heartwarmingly real and sympathetic, and her story provides a much needed mirror for anxious queer girls everywhere."—Kirkus, Starred review

"This is a good companion book for other anxiety-riddled stories, such as The Shattering by Karen Healey, and Finding Audrey by Sophie Kinsella."—Booklist

"This hopeful offering will resonate with young people for their own lives, even if the journey is hard and takes time and patience...[a] compelling portrait of a teen’s experiences with anxiety and challenging family dynamics."--SLJ

"Mac carefully makes clear that Maeve is plenty able to find joy other places than the perfect girl and that she’s working at dealing with her own problems; the romance is therefore lovely and cozy and free from overtones of dependency. The descriptions of anxiety are true and powerful, and romance buffs will likely revel in a book celebrating deep connection."—The Bulletin

"Mac is good at showing how a dread-filled mind works... [An] affecting story.''—Publishers Weekly

• ISBN10: 0399556281
• ISBN13: 9780399556289
• Publish Date: 28 January 2020 (first published 28 February 2017)
• Publish Status: Active
• Publish Country: US
• Imprint: Ember
• Format: Paperback (US Trade)
• Pages: 336
• Language: English
• URL: https://penguinrandomhouse.com/books/isbn/9780399556289

Reviews

[liz089]

DNF. 35%

I'm sorry, but I have no interest in continuing this book. I just can't get into it, and I know it is not a long novel... But I barely read at all last week because I wasn't in the mood to continue with this one, I could not motivate myself and even though I tried a couple of times, I put it away again after a couple of minutes. I can't get into the MC, I don't really get her or are interested in her story... She is very negative and I'm more of a looking on the bright side of things kind of person.

Sooo no. When there are soooo many books that I still want to read, I don't want to linger on something that doesn't work for me.

[Leah]

I’m going to do this review a little differently – instead of a normal review, here are the 10 things I loved about this book, inspired by the title.

I *loved* Maeve. Her voice is so strong, so loud, it will stay with me for ages, after finishing this book.

The mental health rep is fantastic. Maeve worries, but not in the way I worry, or you might worry, but in the way the 3% of people in the world worries, all the time, and scenarios are always going around her head, for fatalities that might befall her, or her family, or anyone close to her, at any time, ever. That’s unfathomable to me, I don’t know how I would cope with all of that, without hiding under a blanket, in bed, forever.

CANADA!!!! I have a love affair with Canada, and the fact the book is 99% set in Vancouver makes me ridiculously happy. It’s the simple things sometimes.

A f/f romance. *Dances* I love f/f romances, they’re adorable and I loved Maeve and Salix.

I loved Claire. It was so refreshing to have a step-mom, step-daughter relationship that wasn’t based on hate or dislike for each other. Claire ROCKED.

Maeve’s step-brothers Owen and Corbin were adorable (I feel like this whole novel is summed up as adorable, to be honest) and I liked that Owen was a bit anxious, like Maeve and Corbin was adventurous and I just loved how they also helped Maeve, without even knowing it.

The ending would normally have made me rage-y, but since I’m coming to accept that happy ever afters aren’t always a possibility, I liked how it ended, because it did have an ending, it didn’t just stop.

Anxiety isn’t the only big topic covered – Maeve’s dad, Billy, struggles with addiction and it actually made me incredibly sad to see him wobbling, and to see Maeve and Claire and Owen and Corbin have to see it happen, too. But it was real, and I liked that.

The cover. I KNOW. That’s SO SHALLOW, RIGHT? But it’s so pretty and I don’t care.

The whole idea of that when you’re in a situation that makes you panic, or worried, or any situation (it works for anything!) you can look around you and list ten things you see. It’s SUCH a good idea.

[shannonmiz]

You can find the full review and all the fancy and/or randomness that accompanies it at It Starts at Midnight
There were quite a few good things going on in this book, so I am going to start with those.

• Maeve's anxiety, especially her intrusive thoughts, were so eerily accurate that I had to actually put the book down a few times. She was scared of so many things, but especially death, and since I have the same panic and anxiety surrounding death, I related to her so much. At one point, she starts researching things that could go wrong with her stepmother's pregnancy, and I had done this with my own pregnancies. Her anxiety mirrored my own so much that it was hard to read. But important, too.


• I loved Maeve's stepmother and half brothers so much. In so many books, the stepmom is the villain, but in this one, she's the damn hero. There were a few times where Claire's decisions weren't the best, but she is only human too of course and had a lot to deal with. Maeve's relationships with them was hands down one of the best parts of the book.


• I enjoyed Maeve's relationship with Salix. This wasn't a coming out book, Maeve was already out to her family, and she and Salix kept running into each other. It was really sweet, if a bit convenient. I liked that Maeve didn't just immediately be "cured" because she wanted to be with Salix; she ends up nearly messing things up a lot, which I think is quite an accurate portrayal. I do wish I had connected with Salix a bit more, but I suppose it was really Maeve's story.

What I did not love as much:

• Maeve's biological parents were absolute disasters. So Maeve's mom had seemed okay. They had a really close relationship, and I was all for that. But then she was going to head off to Haiti with some old guy she barely knew? While Maeve was not doing well at all? And send her to live with her alcoholic/drug addicted dad and pregnant stepmom? What? Who does that? The dad was such a jerk. I get that he had demons of his own, but wow, he was awful. I have at least ten sticky flags that say nothing but "ASSHOLE" on them, in relation to Maeve's dad. Not only is he 100% NOT there for Maeve, he also straight up neglects his pregnant wife and twin six year old sons.


• Speaking of awful parental decisions, Mom and Dad of the Year wouldn't let Maeve take any kind of prescription medication for her anxiety. There was no real reason given for this, other than ignorance. The worst part in my opinion was that this was never fully fleshed out. It could have been used as a learning tool (i.e., Mom and Dad talked to a doctor who explained why medication can help in these situations) and turned into a positive, but instead it was just brushed off. Like Maeve was just some whiny kid who wanted meds, but in truth, she absolutely could have benefited from them, or at the very least, a discussion about them with someone with a medical degree.


• While I don't think Maeve's relationship with Salix was a complete instance of the "savior" thing, Maeve did seem to dare to do many more things with Salix than she would have before. And considering the pressure she was under with her parents, being there for Claire and the boys, and starting a relationship that she was nervous about, this response just didn't seem... authentic.

Bottom Line: This book did have a pretty decent representation of Maeve's anxiety, and I loved that Maeve had some good supports. There were a few things that could have been fleshed out a bit more to make it a stronger message overall.