bookperson
Written on Jan 1, 2020
That's a NO from me, chief.
I saw pretty cutesy cover and read synopsis, thought that would be an amazing quick christmas read. Spoiler alert: it wasn't.
Main characters are plastic-y and all cliches you've ever seen. He's your bad boy that's actually good, and she's perfect girl, that's actually "bad". They fell in love when they were children (6yo), but both thought they can't be together for some reason (the reason is - hero's a dumbass and they both don't know what communication is). Now they're 25 and still virgins and never been kissed before. That's okay and understandable, everybody moves at their own speed, good for them. I genuinely would love to read a romance novel where heroes are virgins and embracing that (not christian lit though), acting as adults about this topic. Also it would have been fun if we saw more kinky virgins in fiction. Ultimatley virgins are amazing, we love to see it. But. When the characters don't act and talk like they are actually inexperienced, when there's no cringey and awkward moments, when the sex scene is in a first 30ish pages... wow. I want some boundaries and build up to a sex scene. I understand that you are horny, but if you can stop and tell the girl why you didn't bring her to the dances when she was 16, you have time to talk about consent, personal boundaries and all that good stuff. IDC it's novella, you can cut heroine's friend or "boyfriend", I bet it won't change much.
The things I particularly didn't like:
- miscommunication about everything. both mc act and think like a horny teenagers and don't want to talk about their feelings.
- no protection. i would've been okay if there's been just two simple lines of dialog where he asks her is she on a pill or they have to use a condom. It's that simple, folks.
-author misses all beats. Her "boyfriend" shows up at his house right after they're kissing, she asking her friend to come watch a movie with her, etc. all the scenes feel like they were just smashed together witout any rhyme or reason. Reading this book is like watching that yotube video of titanic theme song on a flute. You know what I mean.
Since I dnfd this book on page 40 there is my main complaints, but I'm sure I could find many more.
But! This book is hilarious. It's so bad that it's actually good. All cliches and bad takes on tropes, language that heroes use, their actions - pure comedy gold. *chef's kiss*
10/10 creamy c*nts, as our main hero would say.