The Dangerous Art of Blending in

by Angelo Surmelis

Seventeen-year-old Evan struggles to deal with his mother's abuse and his new feelings for his friend Henry.

• ISBN10: 0062659014
• ISBN13: 9780062659019
• Publish Date: 11 June 2019 (first published 30 January 2018)
• Publish Status: Active
• Publish Country: US
• Publisher: HarperCollins Publishers
• Imprint: Collins
• Format: Paperback (US Trade)
• Pages: 336
• Language: English

Reviews

[Sam@WLABB]

Rating: 3.5 Stars

The title of this book eludes to advice the author was given as a small child, that in order to be loved, he had to hide his true self. Reading that broke my heart in half, and so did many parts of this book. This book is about abuse as well as homophobia and is quite painful at times, so be prepared for a little darkness and a bit of weeping.

•Pro: I cared so much for Evan. I was incredibly amazed by how he was able to have any shred of decency left in him after the years of abuse heaped on him. I was so elated, when he was able to find the strength to escape the madness, and also, to love himself.

•Pro: As I was making my way through the story and a tear rolled down my cheek, I couldn't get the image of Faye Dunaway screaming about wire hangers out of my head. That is how well the monster-mother was written. [Note: if you have no idea what I am talking about, google Mommie Dearest.]

•Con: There were some small flow issues in the story and I would have liked a few of the characters to have been more fleshed out.

•Pro: Although part me was, "a little to little, a little too late" with the dad, I still appreciated the effort he put forth. He did make an attempt to foster a relationship with his son. I especially loved when they went for donuts. Those were some of the bright spots in the book.

•Pro: Another bright spot in the book was Henry. He was quite wonderful. He wore his heart on his sleeve and was quite the romantic. Most of all, he truly loved Evan and made him feel loved.

•Pro: Henry's family was also a great source of happiness for Evan, and I was happy they had been there in the years we didn't read about. I feel like they gave Evan hope, and in his situation, he needed to see that a family could be like that.

•Pro: In the author's note, we learn that this story is based on Surmelis' life, that was when I really starting crying. It's very brave to share a story like this, and I think there are many people, who will find comfort from this book, because it's their story too.

•Pro: The ending left me very hopeful. I was happy that Surmelis filled us in on Evan's present and hinted to his future.

Overall: A raw and sometimes painful look at the cycle of abuse and having to hide, who you are in order to please others. I found myself longing for Evan to find the love, safety, and freedom to be his true self.

ARC received in exchange for an honest review.

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[Amber]

The Dangerous Art of Blending In is a really tough book for me to review because it is about such a dark subject matter and also, without going into too much detail, it hit very close to home and it was triggering. I had to keep putting the book down because Surmelis' wrote certain scenes so well that I had to step out of the story for a bit.

The main character, Evan, is Greek-American, gay, in the closet, and is being raised in an abusive household. I loved Evan sooo much. He is the sweetest person and he deserves all the hugs.

Evan's mother is actually the worst. I don't know how else to express my hatred of her in a PG manner. She was physically, mentally, emotionally, and verbally abusive, and it was incredibly difficult to read. Evan tried so hard to live up to his mother's expectations and to do everything "right", but she didn't change. Because people like her don't change. And Evan eventually came to realise that he wasn't the problem here.
Evan's father wasn't much better, as he just sat back and allowed this abuse to happen, only stepping in when Evan's life was actually in danger. It was incredibly difficult to read.

I wasn't too bothered about Henry, the best friend and love interest, because the romance took a backseat to the rest, but he was cute, I guess. I liked his relationship with Evan well enough, but like I said, it was overshadowed by the abuse and the story was really about Evan.

The Dangerous Art of Blending In was one of my best reads of 2017. Everyone should read it when it comes out in January.